Oh hiya, I didn’t see you der. I just got back from hunting moose with a machine gun and hand grenades, the way Jesus commands us to in the New Testament. Gosh, you betcha. I was, uh… I was having one of dem newspapers read to me, and, gosh, uh… things aren’t going well at all in Michigan. Joe Six Pack and Mrs. Six Pack should be voting for me and John, but, well, we think Mr. Obama and his funny grandpa, are, uh… using witchcraft.
I mean, Democrats will raise everyone’s taxes and make us surrender in Iraq like the doggone French. So, you betcha, uh… it’s witchcraft. And I’m immune because my pastor blessed me, but der are hundreds of thousands of people in America, and he can’t get dem all. If he could, we wouldn’t need elections, uh… just, uh… prayer to pick our next president. Hey, but, yeah, uh… yeah, no worries. God will give us the big win when our team, gosh, goes into double overtime. Den we’ll do, uh… sudden death, and we’ll win.
We all know I, uh… whooped Obama’s weepy grandpa last night, when we, gosh, debated. I know with a maverick leading the, uh… way, we’ll win on November 12, too. And I’ll, uh… make the office of vice president powerful, finally, and, uh… gosh, start dem an office of foreign, uh… foreign… policy? Gosh, but it’ll be good. I’m not called Sarah Cuda for nothin’. But, look, I left the stove on, and my kids got homework, so, uh… I’ll tell you the rest later. You betcha.
