Spring is the perfect time for weddings, so much that various retailers consider it “wedding season”. In my line of business, I see soon-to-be brides almost daily, and it can’t help but make me wonder why so many women feel the need to marry. I am a huge advocate for self-empowerment and being self-efficient. Perhaps that has endangered me from becoming interested in a “normal relationship”. I find no interest in becoming a house wife or having children. I don’t think all marriages have to result in those ends, but most commonly do.
I’ve really questioned the whole marriage thing more intensely after the anti gay marriage advocates made the ridiculous argument of gay marriage “destroying the sanctity of marriage”. People get married for green cards. People get married for tax breaks. Some people marry to divorce and gain half their spouse’s assets for alimony. That’s nicely nestled under the umbrella of the sanctity of marriage? I don’t fucking think so. And that really disturbs me.
I have had very meaningful relationships that are in no way considered the norm. And I’m okay with that. However there is an idea of love and commitment that I don’t believe a legal document can grant me. To be honest, the whole legality scares the shit out of me, and maybe that’s because I never want to divorce. Breaking up, as hard as it is, sounds so much better than legally severing ties. I do want to have a ceremony to prove my love for someone in front of close friends and family. I do want a ring to symbolize our commitment to one another. I do want to take the man I love’s last name. But I don’t want to go to court to make it “official”. What is that business? I have to have a judge tell me my love for someone is “legal”? Can I just wear a ring, change my last name, and have an awesome ceremony/party? Hell, there’s a part of me that doesn’t even want to live with the guy!
