Let the cancellation watch begin.
As our local media and municipal governments scrambled to get a piece of the Hidden Palms action, the show was afforded a sycophantic reverence it in no way deserved. If this had been any other moderately-sized population center – namely, not a graveyard for the rich frothing at the mouth for a shred of hipness – our leaders would have laughed when the producers decided not to film in Palm Springs. After all, it’s Kevin Williamson. I can’t recall anyone publicly asking “Why should this concern us? It’s going to be as terrible as everything else Kevin has touched.”
But never mind that. We have a press release to deconstruct.
Coming-Of-Age Drama from Executive Producers Kevin Williamson and Scott Winant Focuses on a Mystery in Steamy Palm Springs
Palm Springs is steamy? Don’t you have to have water around for there to be steam?
Multi-generational “Hidden Palms” focuses on Johnny Miller (Taylor Handley, “The O.C.”), a teen who is struggling to come to terms with two tragedies in the strange and artificial atmosphere of Palm Springs.
Wait, I thought it was steamy! Now you’re painting it as strange and artificial?
In addition to Handley, “Hidden Palms” features a star-studded ensemble cast including “NYPD Blue” veterans Gail O’Grady and Sharon Lawrence, D.W. Moffett (“Traffic”), and fresh faces such as Amber Heard (“Alpha Dog”), Michael Cassidy (“The O.C.”), Ellary Porterfield (“The Prizewinner of Defiance, Ohio”) and Tessa Thompson (“Veronica Mars”).
Never heard of, never heard of, never heard of, never heard of, never heard of, never heard of, and… wait. What was I saying? Oh, right. Never heard of.
If by an act of God (here meaning desperate CW execs) the show makes it past the first 8 episodes, I have some excellent suggestions for second season plotlines. How about an episode shot in real-time in which a small but vocal minority lament the loss of Palm Springs’ “village atmosphere” because some well-meaning developer suggested a few taller buildings be built? If that’s too real, Handley’s character could always find himself entangled in an east valley gang war. That would draw in those elusive male viewers.
Update (5/21/07): Brace yourselves.
