After a Justice Department brief defending the Defense Of Marriage Act by comparing homosexuality to incest and pedophilia, it was clear the Obama administration was coopting yet another Bush-era policy; that is to say, treating America as though it collectively has the intelligence of a preschooler with a severe learning disability. There is room to argue that this is the collective fault of Bush loyalists who “burrowed” into the DoJ just before the Obama administration was handed the keys to the kingdom. The only problem with that idea is that it’s completely wrong. Attorney General Eric Holder is either a clueless rube in the style of Gonzo, or he has at least some idea and say over what comes out of his fiefdom.
And what impressively condescending legal arguments they are. In an attempt to dissuade U.S. District Judge Emmet Sullivan from requesting the FBI’s notes from a 2004 interview with Dick Cheney during the Plame investigation, Justice Department lawyers trotted out a real keeper. It would be a bad idea to hand the notes over, because current and future presidents and vice presidents would feel compelled not to cooperate in criminal investigations for fear of being relentlessly mocked on shows like The Daily Show and The Colbert Report. Who knew the due process of law hinged on the fragile egos of the most powerful democratically elected officials in the United States, if not the world? Threats against themselves, their families and their country they can take. Unimaginable, unrelenting pressure they can take. The unflinching gaze of history they can take. But snark? Snark is an enemy so great that even the most powerful flee in abject terror.
