Sometimes, being a winner isn’t enough to earn you any respect, as perpetual underdog Ron Paul can affirm. The Congressman from Texas won CPAC’s straw poll, an honor which earned him a chorus of boos when the results were announced.
Paul, who ran for president in 2008, took 31 percent of the vote. Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney had won the past three CPAC straw polls but placed second this time with 22 percent. Romney is considered the current frontrunner for the 2012 nod. No other candidate scored in double digits. Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, who did not speak at CPAC, took third place with seven percent.
Also getting boos was former libertarian presidential candidate and professional mustache farmer Bob Barr, who had the audacity to point out that waterboarding is torture.
Didn’t Ann Coulter say John Edwards was gay at CPAC a few years back? Eh, whatevs. Now he’s
“America’s baby daddy,” a “blow-dried evangelical who doesn’t believe in God,” and “the only candidate for vice president on a major party ticket with his own sex tape… which, starting next week, will be available in the [Bill] Clinton library gift shop.”
Re:Generator has committed its best minds to searching for a decent punch line, if any exists.
Newt Gingrinch really likes Eye of the Tiger.
Weepy, creepy, doubleplusgoodconservative Rick “Santorum” Santorum proffered a value judgment about today’s military, insisting that a cultural of political correctness over the forthcoming repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell had them so “indoctrinated” they could no longer “see straight”. Get it? “See straight”? Because of the gays? Isn’t it funny how they put their lives on the line for their country?
Closing out the farcical clown show that was CPAC 2010, Glenn Beck completed his ascension to King of Angry White men by taking the keynote spot last filled by Rush Limbaugh and doing what amounted to a stage version of his Fox show. He even brought along his infamous blackboard, so he had something to misspell words and invent inane acronyms on. If you hate yourself or love Beck and have an hour, here’s a slow drip of your poison:
