Re:Generator Magazine

Canadians had a moment of unexpected excitement when a 48-year-old man tried to breach the security parameter around vice president Joe Biden at the Olympics. According to Mounties on the scene, it wasn’t so much that he looked disheveled or dangerous, but that he seemed interested in Biden at all that tipped them off. The man has since been committed to a psychiatric institution, and is trying to stop the odd looks he gets there by alternately explaining “I wasn’t interested in Biden, I was interested in bitin’” and “I was only there to encourage people to buy tin.” As of this hour, no one believes him, and everyone thinks he’s weird.